Happily Even After

Proverbs 18:22 KJV Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.

Proverbs 31:12 KJV She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

Marriage is a beautiful thing. Beautiful doesn’t mean perfect. No one is perfect. Everyone has something they need to work on. So when we get upset with someone else always consider your ways.

My husband and I have been married for almost four years with plenty of ups and downs. There are times where I wanted to quit and he probably felt the same, but we didn’t. We worked through our challenges. I know the grass isn’t greener on the other side, it’s greener where you water it. Here are a few things that have kept us Happily Even After.

Keeping outsiders just that, out!

1Peter 3:1 KJV Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;

I don’t go into detail about my marital affairs with many. Of course, I have girlfriends I occasionally vent to but I keep that to a bare minimum. Why? Because my friends have my best interest and when my head, my husband, the father of my children decide we want to work it out they won’t understand. They will only remember that times I told them the story where he hurt my feelings. Having people not directly involved with your house giving you advice will only cloud your judgment. As emotional creatures that will only lead to unwise actions that you will regret later.

My first counsel will always be The Most High. Scriptures and prayer should be your first go to. The advice I do want will be from a wise counsel. Someone who has been married 10+ years to the same man is the person I want to talk to.

Ecclesiasticus 6:6 KJV Be in peace with many: nevertheless have but one counsellor of a thousand.

Accountability

There was a time my marriage was in a rough spot and I was exhausted. I didn’t know who to talk to and express how I was feeling. I took this time to do some self-reflecting. Sometimes you could be the toxic person in a situation. I knew there were things I could work on that can cause him to notice the changes I was making and hopefully spark a change in him. I first corrected my actions before I explained to him what was troubling me about his. I started studying biblical principles on marriage. Proven principles that have shown to work overtime. I started reading “The Them in Him” by Dr. Gina Murray. This book helped put a lot of things in perspective with biblical references. Fighting fire with fire is very toxic especially when in the core you want your family to work. So I chose to try the submissive and humble approach and it worked.

Communication

Psalm 50:23 KJV
[23] Whoso offereth praise glorifieth me: and to him that ordereth his conversation aright will I shew the salvation of God.

Whenever I have a problem with HIM I am going to HIM. My husband and I have a very open line of communication. We have a thing that when we are in our feelings we are not to go to bed without letting the other one know. This has worked wonders in our marriage because we aren’t letting anything marinate and build up. There is nothing worse than bringing up old stuff you were harboring from the past into the present. Communicate with your partner when it occurs and get clarity sooner than later.

Be wise about your approach when communicating. Delivery is everything. If you want to be heard, approach your husband with a meek and humble spirit. Choose peace always. What is done is done. We can’t change the past but we correct our actions going in the future.

These are just a few principles that have worked in my family. We argue less and cater more. I couldn’t be happier with where we stand today. What we have overcome and built has made us solid as a family unit.

I want to hear from you. What are some of the ways you and your family remain Happily Even After? Like, comment, subscribe and share!